32 Giving Hurts
I want you to look at if you have a need to serve because you are fixing and it makes you feel better to be fixing others, or if you are balanced within yourself and you’re offering support and help from your place of power. A lot of times we can find ourselves… Let me back up a second. When you’re struggling with something or when you are not feeling appreciative in the world, one of the best ways to engage with that and shift it is to serve others. So service is a beautiful thing, I just want to have you check yourself if you’re feeling depleted, because you shouldn’t feel depleted if you’re balanced.
So if you’re feeling depleted or if your momentum is completely being carried to other’s problems and other’s lives, versus maintaining your balance and being of assistance, then I want you to just look at what’s going on within yourself, because sometimes we have a need to look outside of ourselves instead of within ourselves to balance ourself. That could sound confusing. Sometimes when we aren’t balanced within, we look on the outside to serve and help somebody else, or we can focus there. We can say that we’re helping other people with their problems instead of tending to our own imbalances.
So if we have an insecurity, we can ignore it. If we are helping people in a huge way, we can sometimes ignore something that we could take care of within ourselves. And I’m not saying you shouldn’t be of service, but if your life and your energy is constantly about other people’s life, and if you’re finding yourself depleted, feeling depleted, and every so often something comes up and slaps you in the face and you feel like you’ve been just blindsided and taken advantage of, you are kind of a victim of the moment and you are an innocent bystander…
That never really happens, just so you know, that you’re an innocent bystander and a blindsided victim, there’s always a long pathway of clues that are taking you towards a situation and by the time you get there and you’re blindsided, you haven’t been paying attention for quite some time. So today’s coaching is just wrapped around you taking a good look if you’re feeling like you are a martyr or you’re feeling taken advantage of and you’re extremely kind, it could be that you’re ignoring something within yourself, something that needs to be taken care of that you’re avoiding by helping others.
There’s nothing wrong with helping others, but when you put yourself into harm’s way actually, you put yourself out so far that your helping is actually putting you in jeopardy and taking you out of balance, then it’s time to look within and see what’s going on there. We have a savvy, sneaky little internal guidance system, and often parts of us are willing to ignore our own problem or our own learning because there’s some pain there.
And let me tell you, where there’s pain to go into, when you come out the other side, there’s massive expansion. So I hope this helps some of you today, some of you big givers who find yourself once in a while just shocked and taken aback and taken off guard. And please reply to this email and tell me what you’re thinking.