This is Anne with your Coaching On The Go.

I want to add more to yesterday’s coaching.

You have these basic human needs.

Sometimes they play against each other, depending on your rules.

It is interesting to write down what your rules are in life.

Sometimes it’s hard to even do that.

We operate under these rules, but we often don’t know what the rules are.

One way to discover what your rules are is when you feel offended or hurt a rule has been broken or bent.

If you feel uncomfortable about what to do next when moving forward in your business or life, look at the rules underneath and the feelings causing you to feel internal conflict.

When you look at those, and then write them down, you start to have an understanding of how you operate.

It is said that those with the fewest rules are the happiest.

If you have a whole bunch of rules that you have to follow in your life, you are putting yourself under an incredible structure and making it more difficult to be freely moving.

I was thinking about the basic human needs.

I’ve talked to you many times about the first and the second, the need for certainty and variety.

But as I continued to think about it after the coaching yesterday, I thought about significance.

Depending on what you do, often you do it because, “That’s what I do!”, “That’s who I am!”

It gives you significance.

Me helping my parents and being the first one on the scene, made me feel good.

It emphasized a point I was trying to make in my life, that I was the one that would show up, that I’m ultimately okay.

This will be embarrassing to say, but this is how I used to feel, that I love them more than anyone else, that I have this undying love, that they can count on me because that’s how important they are to me and how appreciative I am for everything that I experienced with them, that I’m the best, I’m the best child in this group of eight children.

You can start to get into the absurdity or the nature of these rules if you take a look at the rules and discover what is pushing and pulling on what you are trying to do in the moment.

As things come up that make it difficult to move forward, look at where those things come from and what they are about.

What is the inner motivation behind you passing on the business?

Perhaps you are always passing on the family thing because the business is so important.

Whatever gets out of whack and keeps you from serving in your life across the board for yourself and others are good spots to look for your rules.

Once you know your rules, you can look at them and see if they are absurd, outdated, good, you’d like to tweak them, or throw them completely out.

This is some of the most essential work you can do in your life, and it’s ongoing.

So get started on this.

Keep track of when you come across a rule through this squeezing discomfort that shows up in your being when you don’t know what to do next.

And have a beautiful day.